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Various Artists | For The Throne: Music Inspired by Game of Thrones

Hold the door: You don't need this batch of vaguely moody, forgettable fare.

822

Winter is here. At least in the Seven Kingdoms of Game of Thrones. But it won’t be here for long: HBO’s massively popular medieval fantasy epic will finally wrap its eighth and final season in a few weeks. So it’s last call for cashing in on the craze — which brings us to the highly unnecessary For The Throne, a disc of music “inspired by” the show. You certainly can’t argue with the calibre of the contributors: The roster includes everyone from rockers like The National and Matt Bellamy to rootsier artists like Maren Morris, The Lumineers and Mumford and Sons, and even urban artists like A$AP Rocky, Travis Scott, The Weeknd and Chloe x Halle. But near as I can tell from this 14-song set, “inspired by” basically means: Any vaguely moody song that includes the words kingdom, crown, power, god, devil, evil, war, wolf, lie, grave, dead, needle and kill. They don’t even have to be especially catchy or original songs, judging by these mostly forgettable and disappointing offerings. Even more disappointing: For some reason, the album doesn’t include Florence + The Machine’s Jenny of Oldstones, a song that ACTUALLY PREMIERED IN THE FREAKING SHOW — and whose lyrics were based on elements from the series’ backstory. Hold the door, indeed.