We all knew this day would come. But did it have to come so soon? With Christmas fast approaching — and with all the subtlety and welcome of a Mack Truck bearing down on us all, I might add — the Late-Night TV Music holiday pageant began in earnest on Monday with an all-female cast of crooners.
Speaking of Mack trucks: The biggest — but certainly not the best — performance of the evening was delivered by none other than Christina Aguilera, who visited Late Night With Seth Meyers to mercilessly and brutally ruin The Christmas Song with her relentless vocal gymnastics, acrobatics and histionics. Granted, asking Aguilera to undersing would waste even more breath than she does. But still: It’s a freaking Christmas carol, lady. Take it down a notch. On the plus side: After her obliviously self-aggrandizing display, pretty much everybody else comes of as subtle and tasteful. Like, say, Meghan Trainor and her lighthearted, appropriately shaded performance of Christmas Got Me Blue on The Late Late Show With James Corden. Or even Sabrina Claudio, purring and moaning her way through the bizarrely sultry Warm December on Jimmy Kimmel Live. Thank Claus that there was one performer who went against the grain with a decent non-seasonal performance: Lana Del Rey, making a rare late-night appearance to present the seductive Let Me Love You Like A Woman on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon. When Lana is coming to save the day, you know things are tough. God help us every one.