Coincidence or conspiracy? You be the judge. This week’s late-night TV action kicked off with not one but two completely unnecessary, wonderfully bad performances from pop-rock theatrical productions: Sting and a chorus singing The Last Ship from his musical of the same name on The Late Late Show With James Corden, and the cast of Broadway’s latest jukebox musical Jagged Little Pill absofuckinglutely slaughtering Alanis Morissette’s Hand in My Pocket on Late Night with Seth Meyers. Granted, they’re both hilariously awful in their own unique ways. In this corner: El Stingareeno’s awkward half-embrace of his duet partner midway through a dead-fish shipwreck of a performance that ends up being the polar opposite of rousing. In that corner: The Jagged cast’s faux thrift-store duds, millennial hipster posturing and forced same-sex smooching. In the end, there can only be one clear winner — and by winner I mean loser, of course. And I think we both know who it is. It’s all of us. We are the victims of the conspiracy. And that can’t be a coincidence. Can it?